Your child just got sent home from school with the swine flu.

Your twelve-year-old hockey player was just suspended for two games for using inappropriate language with the referee.

Your teen-age daughter just informed you she is pregnant.

So what? Now what?

Does so what, now what seem a bit callous to you? Do you want to suggest you could use some sympathy and comfort here? Do you want to make the case that as a parent you have the right to feel bad for awhile? OK. You can have that. Rally the troops. Go get the sympathy and comfort that you feel you deserve. Feel bad for as long as you want.  Find someone to listen to you. Tell your parenting story. Choose the degree of self-pity, ain’t it awful, courage, character, integrity, or responsibility you desire. Tell it soft or tell it loud. Tell it as often as you want. No matter how many times you repeat your parenting story or who you tell it to, it will eventually come down to this: It makes a difference, and it doesn’t matter.

So what? It’s over. You can’t change it. Your daughter is pregnant. Your hockey player is suspended. Your kid is sick and is running a temperature. It is what it is.

Now what? What are you going to do next as a parent? Where do you go from here?  It’s your move.

Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller