Bail out Wall Street. Bail out the banks. Bail out the people and institutions that got us in this financial mess to begin with. Is that a good idea? Who knows? Neither of us.

What we do know is that bailing people out and not letting them experience the legitimate consequences of their actions is a horrible model for our children. It teaches them that you can make dumb choices and get rescued, you can make a poor decision without personally experiencing any negative outcomes, you can engage in activities that hurt lots of other people and come away with no penalties. Our children are watching all this.

Regardless of the decisions our government and major institutions make concerning bail outs, please do not use this harmful strategy with your own children.

It is not helpful to rescue, save, or bail out children for their inappropriate choices or actions. When you do so, you teach your children they do not have to be responsible for their choices and actions. You show them that the cause and effect relationship that is at work in the universe does not apply to them because someone will always be there to save them from experiencing the natural consequences of their actions.

Stop bailing out your children!

Stop running lunch, homework, gym shoes, band instruments, or other forgotten objects up to school. When you do so, you are not giving your children a real reason to remember the forgotten object next time.

Do not return home to get forgotten shin guards for soccer or a teeth guard for karate.  Why would they ever have to remember if you keep bailing them out?

Refrain from giving advances on allowances.  One of the reasons for allowances is to help children learn if they spend it all the first day there is no more until next week. Allow them to learn that lesson.

If your child comes to you at 9:00 pm at night and informs you they need a poster board for a school project, resist the urge to jump in the car and drive all over town trying to find one. Procrastination on their part does not necessitate an emergency on your part. Allow them to experience the consequences. It can be a learning experience.

When your teen gets in over her head with a cell phone bill, parking tickets, or lack of gas for her car, rejoice. She now has the opportunity to learn a valuable lesson about the importance of keeping control of her spending behavior. Allow her to learn the lesson.

Do not pay for it if your child accidentally breaks a neighbor’s widow with a football. Help her create a plan for paying for it. Help her learn that her actions produce results and that she is responsible for the results she creates. If you bail her out by paying for the window, without having a payment plan in place, you teach her that she doesn’t have to be responsible for her actions.

Parent your children like no one else so they can grow up to be like no one else. Resist the urge to bail out your children regardless of what you see modeled in our culture or government. When you regularly hold your children accountable (with an open heart) they will learn to see themselves as the cause of the results they produce. As you help them experience the direct relationship between cause and effect they will become more empowered and view themselves as both capable and responsible. We could use more of that attitude today in our government, our businesses, and in our world.

Chick Moorman and Thomas Haller are the authors of Teaching the Attraction Principle to Children: Practical Strategies for Parents and Teachers to Help Children Manifest a Better World. They are two of the world’s foremost authorities on raising responsible, caring, confident children. They publish a free Uncommon Parenting blog. To obtain more information about how they can help you or your group meet your parenting needs, visit their website today: www.uncommon-parenting.com.